Interview Sans Coffee

Monday, 30 May 2011

Tomorrow I have an interview without coffee. It's at an establishment that was once housed in a rather grand and traditional building that sat equidistant between the MI5 and MI6 buildings on the south bank of the River Thames. That building had offices, board rooms, meeting rooms and a great big room that was decked out like a courtroom where discipline cases were conducted.

However, the establishment was moved a few years ago to a new premises near London Bridge. The new building is a modern, open plan affair with plenty of glass. But it's the open plan feature that's important here.

As you go in you're not met by heavy oak doors that detail the occupant's name and rank as per the building's predecessor. As you enter the new one you find yourself in a vast open space where uniformed officers sit hunched behind flat computer screens. Whenever I enter it reminds me of the opening scenes of The Office, where a telephone rings in the distance and there's the constant murmur of tippy tappy keyboards. As you pass through the threshold and into the work area heads pop up above work stations as the residents crane their necks to discover who's just entered their territory. It's this behaviour that has led to the new building being termed 'Meerkat Manor.'

So tomorrow I'm at 'Meerkat Manor' for an interview and to be presented with formal charges. I've been a very naughty boy. Tomorrow is the forerunner to The Carpet Parade and the familiar words:

'Soldier and the right....QUICK MARCH!' which echo loudly in my mind.

But what's this?

Have I hurt anyone? No.

Have I killed anyone? No.

Is there mass loss of property due to my professional incompetence? No.

But someone is offended so I'll tap the boards tomorrow in grey slacks, blue shirt, blazer and brogues.

I will admit to having been slightly nervous about tomorrow. Not because I'm of a nervous disposition but because I know many of the residents of Meerkat Manor and the shunning of the diseased one will be embarrassing for both myself and those I know.

But a blog post by a friend brought me to my senses and made me remember where I've come from and my nerves are no more.

I'm not from a privileged background and a good school but from the mean streets of Peckham and the hell hole that was The Beaufoy School for Boys.

I'm not from a comfortable office where the tea boat running dry is a major calamity but from the British Army where a major calamity transposes to a colleague paying the ultimate price and going home in a flag draped coffin.

I shall reproduce my friend's blog post here.

It's short. It's sweet. It's to the point. And there's more plagiarism to come.

As I travel this path less travelled I have to say thanks, Tomo.

Song for a Pirate



Thomas said...

Goof luck. Illegitimi non carborundum.

Thomas said...

Shit. I still can't type. Good luck, anyway.

Anonymous said...

The gods tempt people for which they are most weak. Artificial Intelligence will create desire in people's minds for the following sins:::
1. Alcohol
2. Drugs
3. Preditory "earning"
4. Homosexuality
5. Gambling
6. Something for nothing/irresponsibility (xtianity)
7. Polygamy/superiority over women/misogyny (Islam)
Much like the other prophets Mohhamed (polygamy/superiority over women/misogyny) and Jesus (forgiveness/savior), the gods use me for temptation as well. In today's modern society they feel people are most weak for popular culture/sensationalism, and the clues date back to WorldWarII and Unit731:TSUSHOGO::The Chinese Holocaust.
It has been discussed that, similar to the Matrix concept, the gods will offer a REAL "Second Coming of Christ", while the "fake" Second Coming will come at the end and follow New Testiment scripture and their xtian positioning. I may be that real Second Coming.
What I teach is the god's true way. It is what is expected of people, and only those who follow this truth will be eligible to ascend into heaven as children in a future life. They offered this event because the masses have just enough time to work on and fix their relationship with the gods and ascend, to move and grow past Planet Earth, before the obligatory xtian "consolation prize" of "1000 years with Jesus on Earth" begins.

Your job as a future mother is to learn the god's ways and to help your child understand despite the negative reinforcement and conditioning of today's society. Without consciousous parents the child will have no hope, and may even exaserbate their disfavor by becoming corrupted in today's environment.
Your ultimate goal is to fix your relationship wiith the gods and move on. You don't want to be comfortable here, and the changes in Western society in the last 100 years has achieved just that.
1000 years with Jesus is the consolation prize. Don't be deceived into thinking that is the goal.

The Prince of Darkness, battling the gods over the souls of the Damned.
It is the gods who have created this environment and led people into Damnation with temptation. The god's positioning proves they work to prevent people's understanding.
How often is xtian dogma wrong? Expect it is about the Lucifer issue as well.
The fallen god, fighting for justice for the disfavored, banished to Earth as the fallen angel?
I believe much as the Noah's Flood event, the end of the world will be initiated by revelry among the people. Revelry will be positioned to be sanctioned by the gods and led for "1000 years with Jesus on Earth".
In light of modern developments this can entail many pleasures:::Medicine "cures" aging, the "manufacture" of incredible beauty via cloning as sex slaves, free (synthetic) cocaine, etc.
Somewhere during the 1000 years the party will start to "die off", literally. Only those who maintain chaste, pure lifestyles will survive the 1000 years. They will be the candidates used to (re)colonize (the next) Planet Earth, condemned to relive the misery experienced by the peasantry during Planet Earth's history.
If this concept of Lucifer is true another role of this individual may be to initiate disfavor and temptation among this new population, the proverbial "apple" of this Garden of Eden. A crucial element in the history of any planet, he begins the process of deterioration and decay that leads civilizations to where Planet Earth remains today.

Only children go to heaven. By the time you hit puberty it is too late. This is charecteristic of the gods:::Once you realize what you have lost it is too late.
Now you are faced with a lifetime to work to prepare for your next chance. Too many will waste this time, getting stoned, "Hiking!", working, etc.

Subversive Runner said...

Err....yeah, thanks, Anonymous. I can only sumise that you cut and pasted that rather long and involved comment or you're living alone in a small, shabby flat, and have covered the walls in hand written religious twaddle that identifies 'Hikers' as the world's wrongdoers and the sons of Beelzebub. Whichever it was I truly thank you for your comment but please don't hunt me down and slay me in His name for owning a pair of 'Hiking' boots. I thank you.

Debs M-C said...

I love your anonymous comments ;-) Too funny.